


white lies'll save you

by Transistors



Category: Twin Peaks
Genre: Cheating, Compulsive Heterosexuality, F/F, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Internalized Homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-03
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-05-01 17:16:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14525454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Transistors/pseuds/Transistors
Summary: If there is only one thing that Norma is ever allowed to be grateful for is the fact that the majority of Twin Peaks is very trusting - especially when it comes to two people of the same gender hanging out with each other.No one ever suspects a thing.





	white lies'll save you

**Author's Note:**

> To be honest, I want to say this fic is a sort of delirious mess - I had no real idea in mind when I was writing this, even though I did want to write this. I might write another fic for these two, but I have this to say: David Lynch, I will fucking bury your twin peaks in queerness until you straight up sue me, or so help me god, and also, Norma and Shelly are like the healthiest relationship in the world and they are fanfuckingtastic.
> 
> They're lesbians, Harold.
> 
> Note: the comp het and internalized homophobia tags are there just as a warning and precaution; Norma thinks a lot about how no one suspects anything because they're two women, in their day and age, and the comp het is briefly mentioned a few times where Norma thinks about how she has had to be in straight relationships just because society told her to.

If there is one thing Norma is quietly grateful for when it comes to Twin Peaks, is that everyone is so immediately trusting of each other... especially when they’re of the same gender. She doesn’t know how many times Shelly and her have gone out, with Leo being none the wiser to what they are like behind the drawn curtains; she has always been so very grateful for this. No one assumes anything, and Shelly has a life almost normal thanks to how she and Norma are like in secret; “Leo doesn’t know any better,” Shelly reassures, “he just thinks we’re annoyingly feminine. I do everything he asks early and he doesn’t seem to mind.”

Though, Norma doesn’t doubt that he is still _horrible_ to her. But it is better than the alternatives, with Norma gently encouraging Shelly to try and be early and on time with everything, changing her for the better for the future – where they are both planning something, where they won’t stand for the way Leo treats her, and Norma is so deliberate in her plans. Something that she has never had to consider before, not when her life hasn’t been drowned in Shelly and how much she wants her to be happy.

No one suspects anything, and everyone already knows how close and kind to each other they have been; even if Leo seems to hate her for taking up Shelly’s time, he isn’t home often enough for him to really complain, and she always does her chores way earlier than Leo expects. It keeps him from doin something too drastic to her, from punishing her for nothing, nothing at all, and Norma will always be so sweet to him and give him pies that she knows he loves.

It quiets him, like he is some sort of beast that needs to be tamed, and Norma puts her hand on Shelly’s bicep and thanks her for being a hard-worker, calls her amazing and sings her praises. She leaves quick so that Leo won’t stare for too long, but they always have any other time for them to sequester each other away for a while.

They don’t have to worry about Norma’s husband, not for a long time, and Shelly has Leo’s schedules memorized – they wrap around each other, hugs tight and kisses hot and heavy, a desperate edge to each other as they kiss and grasp one another as though in fear that someone will walk in and ruin everything for them. They can be in absolute isolation in the forests, with nothing but the little critters here and there to interrupt them, and they will always have this fear instilled in them like someone will walk by and shoot them for being like this.

“It’s okay, it’s okay.” Norma will always whisper to Shelly, even if she herself doesn’t believe in the words, before she kisses her to swallow up her whimpers and terror, both of them shadowed by a heavy hanging tree, hiding them away from everyone but God (and perhaps more, a voice in the back of Norma’s head whispers) as they engage in their affection. The men from their lives are briefly forgotten, melting away into worries that don’t matter when Norma has Shelly on her lap, her hands in her silky hair with her legs on either side of her, the smell of earth invading their noses.

Their lipstick mix together and Norma is glad that they always bring their lipstick with them, though that thought fades away quick when Shelly is kissing down her neck and leaving behind little red lip marks all over, her head falling back so that she can give the other more room. But their movements are hurried, rushed, and they will never go all the way – especially not in the forest, where they will get dirty and messy, where Norma feels safe but it never is enough.

She always feels like they are being watched, even if realistically she knows there is absolutely no one there. The town isn’t safe for them, nowhere near it at all, where prying eyes and ears are everywhere and someone will realize that they are more than just friends to each other – friends of the same gender, where they seek solace in tight embraces, skin to skin, and lip-locking that makes Norma feel _more_ than just what she is right now.

More than just the husband of a liar, manipulator, murdered – more than just a woman in a diner, working tirelessly to appease everyone, with the men in her life being a nonstop source of frustration and bemusement, where she doesn’t want to be in those relationships yet she...

Shelly cups her cheeks and this time, she is the one whispering _it’s okay_ into Norma’s lips before she swallows up her terrors, her worries, her self-depreciating thoughts that sink her deeper and deeper into the grave that she has been digging for years. Her voice drags her out of her own grave and Norma can cry from it all being too much –

But that doesn’t matter right now, not when they have to rush through their love and affection, clawing and tearing even with there are animals. Both of them tensing up at any breaking of twigs, always bolting apart from each other and wiping at their faces, before they curl up into each other when it is just an animal with heavy steps that is making its way through the forests of Twin Peaks.

Even if it feels like she can’t keep this up forever, this hiding, she has to – for Shelly’s sake more than her own, where Leo won’t give her a chance to defend herself, while Norma can easily lie her way out of it. After all, she has lied to her mother for so many years about how she feels for men, disguising self-hating, dangerous crushes for women under a guise of desiring a man not real – coming back to her with crocodile tears that all the man she is in love with are just not like what she has imagined, the truth rising up as vomit in her throat.

What is a little more lying when it comes to protecting the one she loves most?

**Author's Note:**

> [My Twitter](https://twitter.com/starrelia) | [My Tumblr.](https://masculinedevil.tumblr.com)


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